Stop Making a Fool of Me!

My nerves were shot to hell on Monday as I watched the Hills. This season Audrina has really irritated me. Her usual ding dong personality that makes me want to kick her in the chest is not the cause of my irritation; rather it’s her willingness to be clowned by Justin Bobby. The irritation just resurfaced my exasperation from conversations I have been having with friends and family. It left me with a question of why women allow ourselves to be placed situations that places more emotional debt that we should have in our lives.

Audrina has been in a sporadic relationship with Justin Bobby for about two years. During that time Justin Bobby has taken her places and left her there without saying good-bye and blatantly disrespected her and her friends. The brink for me was this past episode, when he and Audrina went out to a night club together and he walked away from her to hook up with another female across the room in front of her and her friends. After he laughed in her face while she confronted the girl, he runs after her and basically tells her she can’t and won't stop talking to him and if she doesn’t get in the car with him right now then he is leaving. My statement to the dusty busted Justin Bobby would be, “will kick yoself in the knee and get to walking.”

This is the prime example of how women set themselves up for emotional debt. The signs are there all along, yet we choose to ignore their unwillingness to be in a relationship with us. We need to learn to listen to a man’s actions and not his words. His actions can be giving the message that he doesn’t want any thing from you, but to play a game, while his words are telling you that he wants to cherish you forever. If his actions do not coincide with his words, the fool is looking for a good game of Life to play with you. Please take off running and don’t look back.

Now don’t be shame if you don’t know the clear signs of the game of Life, some of these men are slick and definitely don’t be shame if you fell for it, just take it for what it was: A life learning lesson and vow to never do it again. Some clear examples of the game of Life:
1. If he never takes you out or comes to visit you during daylight hours, he is not seriously interested in you.
2. If he is not interested in what your close friends and family think about him, that fool doesn’t care about you.
3. If he doesn’t want you to have close girlfriends it’s because he’s scared one of your friends will reveal his game.
4. If he constantly changes the subjects or say the infamous “Things are good the way they are,” when you talk to him about taking your relationship to the next level.
5. If he constantly leaves you to go hang out with his boys, he is not interested in you.
6. When he is in front of his boys he plays it like you two are just good friends.
These are just of few of he signs, but know that there are many more out there that women overlook when getting to know a man or forcing herself in a situation that shouldn’t be.

Anything that absolutely perturbs me: women should stop trying to fool themselves into believing they could be friends with men after they have dogged them out. If he was your friend he wouldn’t have put you through all of the pain. He would have been up front about his feeling and intentions instead of taking you on a roller coaster ride to Tears and Tissue land. Friends don’t use and abuse one another. If he was a girlfriend and she stole your shoes, money, and slept with your man you wouldn't be friends with her, so why believe you can be friends with a man the stole your heart and played with your emotions.

Honestly I am tired of talking about this. I hope all women wake up and understand their worth. As stated in a Young Adult gathering at church “God didn’t settle for just anything when he made the earth, he didn't settle for just anything when he made you, so why settle for just anything in Love and Life.” When you appreciate yourself and your worth, you can’t and won’t settle for just anyone who doesn’t appreciate your full value.

GOD BLESS!